Tag Archives: faith

where god is

I have suddenly realized that somehow, somewhere, over the last however so many months, I have lost my faith. I used to center it in the altruism of humankind, the ability of my fellow creatures to reach outside themselves and … Continue reading

Posted in Book Two, Setting 1 | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment

surgereve

Despite still being exhausted after the most challenging semester of school of my entire life, which now encompasses a full ten years total of post-secondary education, the day before my second surgery I was buzzing around like a four-year-old on … Continue reading

Posted in Aspect IV | Tagged , , , , | Leave a comment

orphaned

So according to my therapist, I am still angry, I am still fighting giving up my autonomy, and I need to redefine the God in which I believe, since the one that I used to believe in doesn’t jibe with … Continue reading

Posted in Aspect II | Tagged , , , | 2 Comments

beware of dog

“If I had a dollar for every person who suggested acupuncture to me, I wouldn’t have to work,” I hissed, as soon as the young woman had walked far enough up the driveway to be out of earshot. “Girl, you … Continue reading

Posted in Aspect II | Tagged , , , , | Leave a comment

done and next

Another visit to the pain management doctor. Another handful of prescriptions, after another diagnostic scan that showed nothing. Nothing. I received a detailed MRI, called an arthrogram, of the entire underside of my scapula and surrounding tissues, and it revealed precisely … Continue reading

Posted in Aspect I | Tagged , , | 1 Comment

open letter to god

Hey there, it’s me, your favorite kicking can T.G. Ape. I know you know what’s going on with me down here, so there’s probably no point in a recap. Suffice it to say that it’s been pretty crappy, for a … Continue reading

Posted in Aspect I | Tagged , , , , | 2 Comments

time, space, and state of being

Time as we understand it is a linear, stepwise progression; measurable, dependable, irreversible. But there are physicists who will tell you that this is an illusion imposed by our own minds, which are incapable of conceiving anything beyond a progressive, … Continue reading

Posted in Aspect I | Tagged , , , | 1 Comment

fate vs. faith

I started a blog post yesterday and walked away from it after the third paragraph. It was a post about the fact that I will probably never bear children of my own. Of course this is upsetting. Few women run up … Continue reading

Posted in Aspect I | Tagged , , , , , , | Leave a comment

tribute to Momma Ape

I’ve mentioned her a few times in this blog, so regulars know that Momma Ape has been struggling with a host of pain and mobility issues since I was a teenaged ape. But I wanted to take this Mother’s Day … Continue reading

Posted in Aspect I | Tagged , , , , | 1 Comment

hope

Hope is everywhere. If we gave it form and substance it would stifle us, there is so much of it. It blooms in every conversation I have about my condition. The nerve ablation has created an entire morass of it, … Continue reading

Posted in Aspect I | Tagged , , , , | 2 Comments